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 Post subject: The Plumber Knight Returns - Episode 10
PostPosted: Thu Jun 26, 2014 2:54 pm 
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TPKR Episode 10 is now Live!

Feedback, reviews, critiques and your general thoughts are all welcome! Enjoy!

The Plumber Knight Returns - Episode 10:
http://youtu.be/Vf-kNRcOEYA

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Thank you very much for watching Season 1! We'll be updating you soon on our plans for Season 2! =)

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 Post subject: Re: The Plumber Knight Returns - Episode 10
PostPosted: Thu Jun 26, 2014 3:20 pm 
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 Post subject: Re: The Plumber Knight Returns - Episode 10
PostPosted: Thu Jun 26, 2014 3:29 pm 
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Yeah, the reveal... COMPLETELY unexpected!! Now I wanna know how he came back! And here's another thing; how many more StMB characters will be coming back next season, I wonder? Wario and Mona, or at the least, just Wario, HAS to come back somehow, now that "he" (no spoilers) has been revealed as their SON! However, I do wanna say real quick; that reveal did seem kinda non-chalant. That's why there's GOTTA be more on that next season (which I'm assuming there will be)! But the Koopa reveal... I hope the premiere is nothing but his explanation of how he returned that takes up the whole episode lol. But overall... WOW. Crazy!!

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 Post subject: Re: The Plumber Knight Returns - Episode 10
PostPosted: Thu Jun 26, 2014 4:52 pm 
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Well Jigglypuff that reveal was unexpected both of them. I knew Bill had a connection to Wario as soon as he said in the trailer he wasn't who he said he was but the connection he had to him was unexpected and makes me excited to see where his character goes in the next season. The fight with Jekyll was cool even if his death was a tad underwhelming but perhaps he isn't really dead I mean several gun shots were fired along with fireballs and those didn't kill him right away but then again maybe it was taking awhile for the wounds to take effect who knows we'll have to wait and see. But the fight with the Koopa was pretty cool and it was great to see the beam swords back even though the colour of the Koopa's was sort of a hint to who he really is before he took off the mask. And now to talk about that reveal:

WARNING SPOILERS FOR ANYONE WHO DOESN'T WANT TO BE SPOILED DO NOT READ AHEAD!

Maybe a tad predictable to some I wasn't guessing the Koopa's identity in case I was wrong so the Koopa being the Darkness was completely unexpected to me. At first I was sort of confused and like "Really again?" but then I realised the Darkness in this story is pretty much like the Joker in the Dark Knight Returns. A character who lives for taking on his arch enemy and would stop at nothing to destroy him no matter who he had to kill to do it and that's what the Darkness did he killed Luigi and several others just to get to Mario much like how once he learned of Batman's return a comatose Joker awakened from his slumber and began doing what he always did fighting Batman. Granted Joker had no connections to the Mutants but I can understand Richie combining both stories into one to save time. Great reveal either way and I'm curious to see how he survived this time considering last time we saw him he put himself back in Mario thus vanquishing him forever not to mention he started to turn over a new leaf but I guess he didn't and it'll be great to see how he came back.

Overall impressions of Season 1 this was a great series Richie. It's a great series with good performances and high production value and a great story that kept me guessing and a great continuation of Stupid Mario Bros and proves as the next evolution of the RichAlvarez channel. You guys have come a long way as filmmakers and I've loved watching you grow and I will continue to watch you grow and support you no matter what. Great job Richie and crew can't wait for Season 2.


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 Post subject: Re: The Plumber Knight Returns - Episode 10
PostPosted: Thu Jun 26, 2014 5:07 pm 
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As promised, I re watched the entire season so that I could fully list what I liked, what I didn't like, and perhaps list the things that no longer bothered me. Before I get to any of that though, I'm just gonna review the episode.

The fight against Jeckle was pretty much exactly how I expected it to be, while I have no issues with the fight, I think killing Jeckle may have been a mistake (I'll list why this is a problem later). The dialogue in this episode was great in MOST every scene and the discussion with the Koopa was certainly one of your best moments in the series. The beam sword fight was better than any one that came before it in SMB and I'll just save my breath by saying that all the effects done in this episode were well executed.

One thing that bothered me more than it should have was the reveal that Bill is Wario's son. While this was a great idea and all (and I certainly didn't see it coming) I think the dialogue should have been a bit more emotional. The transition between regular news guy and super hero's son was just to quick in my opinion. I also thought Mario's rescuing of Denise seemed to be cut a bit short, but on the other hand, I realize that pacing is an important thing, and that the two of them having a five minute long conversation would take away from the threat at hand. Perhaps just one more line of dialogue would have sat better with me. That leaves us with the big reveal: Darkness is the Koopa. The first time I watched the episode, I was all like: "Huh?" But the second time, I was all like "Huh?" I'll save this topic towards the end of this post. I'm not necessarily upset about it, but I'm not totally happy about it either. In all, this episode gets a 9.5 out of 10 (cause I don't give 10s easily ;) ). Enough blabbering though, lets get to the overall review.

Two Big Critiques:

1: I know that in a lot of the situations Mario was put into, he had to kill the villains (Mayor Carson and Jeckle), but killing baddies means that you have to erect new ones to take their place. Now I have no problem with you striving to create a bad guy better than Jeckle, but what I'm saying is that by allowing the bad guy to cross over into another season without some "OH, HE GOT REVIVED!!!" mumbo jumbo, allows for there to be more speculation. If Jeckle had survived, we could all wonder "Gee, I wonder what Jeckle is up to in season 2?" or, if Mayor Carson had also survived people could wonder "Perhaps Carson and Jeckle will team up to fight Mario! That'd be so cool!" But, for all I know, maybe they didn't die at all, or maybe this is all part of your grand scheme, I dunno.

2: I know Darkness is one of your favorite characters, and perhaps even some other members of the casts' favorite, but bringing him back to life seems like a waste of potential to me. The way I see it, Darkness was already a character who had been well explored and well portrayed, and his death not only symbolized the end of his life, but the end of an era. Darkness was so vital in his appearances that his "final" death was supposed to reflect on the fact that the struggles of the past were over. Who knows, perhaps this is a different Darkness or maybe its not Darkness at all, but I'm just not sure why it had to be anything like him at all. My biggest fear is that you did this just to satisfy your love and the fans' love of Darkness. Hopefully this is not the case, and you brought him back for a reason that will make complete sense later on.

After watching every episode one after the other, I think I really began to see the bigger picture behind all of this. Watching only one episode at a time DOES NOT do this series justice. I feel as if I better related to the characters as well as the plot. Also, on such a large spectrum, the little problems I had before didn't bother me as much in the effects category. Never-the-less, some dialogue in the episodes still felt a bit awkward. The strange thing about Jeckle is that he has the capability of saying incredible lines, and ones that fall incredibly flat. I'm not going to ramble about each instance, I think you know what I mean (and it was not just Jeckle). As a whole, I firmly believe he became my favorite character despite any problems I had with him. There were some things in this season that confused me, on the grounds that I wasn't sure if they were just useless filler scenes, or if you have a bigger plan for them in the future. People such as Ness or that goomba you unmasked earlier, seemed pointless here, but will hopefully be quite prominent in the next season. I want to see Ness throw down in the next season, I doubt I stand alone on that. If I had to give an overall thought on this season, it would be that this is your ground zeroes (Metal Gear reference intended). You had to establish a plethora of new characters and basically come up with a whole new plot. Quite frankly, it should get easier from here. Easier to build characters, compile mysteries and side plots, and learn from your mistakes to become even better. Even though this does seem to be a sequel to SMB and you can use that to your advantage, you still have a lot of work to do. I have no doubt that you'll be able to get all 10s in the episodes to come.


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 Post subject: Re: The Plumber Knight Returns - Episode 10
PostPosted: Thu Jun 26, 2014 5:29 pm 
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Alright, have time to do a full review, and then will follow it up with a Season 1 review to cover everything (including weeks I missed). Let's start with the finale.

- You know... I did not expect that kind of death with Jeckle. It was unexpected, and... I really liked it. You would think I would be underwhelmed by this death but... I actually liked it. Good call!

- Woooow! Well, there's the confirmation (I think?) that this is a sequel series to Stupid Mario. Bill (But not really Bill) is the son of Wario and Mona. Nice twist. And now he wants to go help. I've been a bit disappointed that Matt was only in the studio (even if it made sense for his character up until now), but this makes up for it. Can't say I'm not curious how this will turn out.

- And Denise is free. That was easy. A little too ea- Oh, card saying to go to the forest. Alright.

- ... Ok, I know I said I wouldn't say this anymore but... Good god, those fantastic shots of the forest. I love these shots so much.

- Oh man. Beam Sword Fight. BEAM SWORD FIGHT. (Also, I liked the pre-beam sword reveal talk.) I should have made popcorn before watching this.

- Waaaaait a minute. Why didn't he use the beam sword on Jeckle? I mean, I understand if for editing reasons it may have been a bit much. But in story reason would be nice to hear.

- THIS FIGHT IS AWESOME. #1 Beam Sword Fight of all time on the choreography alone!

- WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT? SHADOW MARIO?!?!?! WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT? (THANK YOU FOR NOT BEING LUIGI LIKE EVERYONE PREDICTED IT WOULD BE!)

- ... WHAT. WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT? THAT'S THE END? But but... WHAT?!?!?!? I mean, nothing wrong with the ending being there, good build up for season 2. But... I NEED ANSWERS ASAP! (Basically, I need Season 2 soon. I mean, take all the time you need it but... Wow!)

Welp. That was an ending. And I have to say, this turned out much better than I anticipated. I'd have to say I would like to see Denise (even if it is understandable why she only had so much time on screen) to do a little more this season/hopefully do more next, since she seemed to be less important at times/ended with the kidnapping. I have to say though, this was a fantastic first season of a sequel series. The fantastic cinematography. The perfect variety in minions (both serious and the right level of cheesy), the variation on source material inspiration, fantastic new characters, pacing of season plot being near perfect (beginning was off, but as I've said, you had a lot to set up, and I understood why).

You know what? I think this was the best production you guys have done. And I think any flaws this season had will probably be made up based on this ending alone. I look forward to Season 2.

... But. I would like, just out of curiosity, a few questions to be answered.

#1. Beam Sword not being used on Jeckle. I do have to ask about this, since you established Mario having it on him. Unless he grabbed it after his fight or something.

#2. I'm going to guess this was to prolong/motivate Mario to keep fighting and come after him, but just to confirm, why did (after fighting Jeckle) Shadow Mario make it easy for Mario to rescue Denise?

#3. Is the reason Jeckle wasn't harmed by Mario's fireballs more because he's (what I'm assuming to be, correct me if I'm wrong) a Bane inspired character, or because of something similar to the whole Vherestorm thing from Season 4? I realize this may be a "We can't answer this now, wait for Season 2" question.

Anyway, that's all I have to say. Looking forward to Season 2!

(Oh, and MVPs of this season: Ed, Doug, Chris, Scott, and Rich. With honorable mention to Jackie and Matt, who I liked but wished to see just a little bit more this season to seal the deal. Also, I see Jason Bross is responsible for the Aerial Shots. Someone tell him that I think he is awesome, and his work is appreciated so much at least by me. If that means anything.)

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 Post subject: Re: The Plumber Knight Returns - Episode 10
PostPosted: Thu Jun 26, 2014 5:46 pm 
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For once, I'm not going to comment on technical points. I was disappointed by this episode and your writing.

All I can say is plot holes, plot holes, and plot holes. It's been implied that this is in the same universe as Stupid Mario Brothers. The Darkness was inside Mario, unless you have some explanation as to some sort of separation, I have a huge problem with this. Also, the beam swords were not supposed to work anymore upon Merlin's death.

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 Post subject: Re: The Plumber Knight Returns - Episode 10
PostPosted: Thu Jun 26, 2014 9:24 pm 
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....Well then. This was a fine finale. And I pretty well enjoyed it for the most part.

The reveal with Bill was surprising but makes sense, after all someone like Wario in this series should be just as old as Mario with the years that have passed. It made more sense for him to be his son.

The fight with Jeckle was interesting. I was expecting an all out beat down but Mario went for something a lot better and less bigger. After all Jeckle did say it would take more than one bullet to kill him, so a lot of them might do the trick.

Denise's rescue felt rushed but considering that the big showdown with the Koopa was about to go down straight after I could forgive it for not wasting any time. Denise's kiss with Mario was ok to me, sure some might be turned off to the age difference (in the show obviously :P) but it didn't feel like anything huge. I did like Mario's remark that she kissed him instead of the other way around.

Now for the fight with the Koopa. I was really pleasantly surprised that you bought the Beam Swords back. Such a classic part of all the previous big Mario fights, then again the beam swords have been a big reason for why some videos of yours are delayed considering the SFX work so maybe I should've expected it.

But yeah that Beam Sword fight was phenomenal, I'd say even better than all the previous fights in StMB. The moevements, the struggling, the choreography. I loved Koopa's multiple flips as Mario dodged his beam sword Matrix style.

Now as for the reveal. When it comes to big reveals unexpected can be good but also bad depending on the situation. The reveal that the Koopa is the Darkness is a mix of both. On one hand it's unexpected because nearly everyone else thought it might be Luigi or hell even Nox Decious. But on the other hand this also raises a lot of questions regarding this series being a sequel to Stupid Mario Brothers.

If the Darkness is alive then how did he survive his fight with Nox Decious? How did he get out of Mario after he, Link and Merlin combined their souls to help him defeat Ganon? You better have some good explanations for next season because otherwise this feels like you are just bringing back a favourite character of yours because you felt the opportunity was too good to pass up.

There are some upsides:
Like itsjustsomerichiefan posted, the Darkness's actions work well since he acts as a stand in for the Joker (a very clear inspiration for him since he was in StMB) as part of this series's homage to the Dark Knight Returns. In that respect it is an appropariate reveal.

Spoiler:
Though there's this interesting theory by a fan on this Facebook post in the comments: https://www.facebook.com/RMAProd/photos ... 07/?type=1

Quote:
Dillon Crawford: Here's my theory: Waluigi had said that the Darkness was a being made of Decious' Dark Magic and Mario's Spirit. When the Darkness have Mario his spirit, only the dark magic remained, roaming the earth for years. When Mario found Peach dead, the Darkness struck Mario, causing him to go into a blinding rage and behead Bowser. He probably stole a part of his soul again. Either that, or he eventually was able to reobtain physical form with just dark magic, which would explain why he is so evil again. Hell, this even goes back to Merlin's Riddle. "When Brightest, it's Darkest. When Darkest, it's gone. When gone forever, so are you." Maybe the Darkness' life is bound to Mario in some way? Much like how Mario was able to come back from the dead because of the darkness.

It's made me think and even though I didn't like it at first, it's certainly growing on me!


Considering that the last we know of the Darkness was that he was a part of Mario's spirit, this theory feels very likely.

Other musings:
- I gotta give the whole cast crew a big shout out for the all the great work on this show. The tone, the production value, those aerial shots. It's all so well made and well acted. So again all of you guys did great.

TheInsanityProd wrote:
Also, the beam swords were not supposed to work anymore upon Merlin's death.

I'm pretty sure that was only the case for the Nether Saber, not all the Beam Swords.

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 Post subject: Re: The Plumber Knight Returns - Episode 10
PostPosted: Sun Jun 29, 2014 4:55 am 
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Well, I apologize that I couldn't give as much feedback in the past few weeks. My classes, work schedule, and so forth has been a huge pile on my plate.

I got to say, as a whole Season, it's really great. I love the build up, the tension of terror, Denise, Mario, the aerial shots, and so many elements in the past episodes that I thought was really great! It felt like you didn't miss any opportunities with what you were limited down to produce.

As for this episode, there are two goofs I noticed. One is that you do see people walking behind the bushes behind Jeckle in one shot. The other is that Koopa spelled "Forest" with two "R"s.
Darkness: I didn't go to school, okay, so shut up!

I like the fight with Jeckle. And how he went down, while it did seem kind of slow, I thought it was good intention to ask the question "was it enough to finish him?" I like how you don't clarify he's dead. He just drops to the ground. So there's a chance he could be brought back for Season 2.

The reveal of Bill Summers as Wario's son was quite a nice twist! I can't wait to see what this guy does in Season 2 if he's going to fight by Mario's side. Sure it was kind of rushed, but I didn't mind it so much.

Awesome kiss! It was definitely the best part of that scene. Again, some people say it's rush, but I thought it was enough for them to have a quick talk, a quick kiss, and then get back to stopping Koopa. Age difference a big problem? Nah. It didn't bother me when a human being married an ape in the Stupid Mario Brothers finale.

As for the showdown between Koopa and Mario, it was so well choreographed! Probably the best beam sword fighting since Wario and the Darkness' from the Stupid Mario Brothers Movie. Phase 1 that is.

Now we get to the big plot hole that people seem to be polarized on the most. The reveal that the Darkness was Koopa all along. Just like everyone else, I did not see that coming. All I can say is thank god it's not Luigi. If the excuse was "because I'm always second to you," that would have killed the show. Come on people, the sibling rivalry thing only exists in bad fan fiction. You can forgive some of the moments in Stupid Mario Brothers since it was played for comedy or Luigi was being possessed by Nox Decious. Now as for the Koopa being the Darkness, this is a really bold choice. I'm not saying it was a good one, but it's not a bad one either. But just like everyone else, there better be an explanation on how this could be possible. Does it raise suspense intention so it gets us hyped for Season 2? Sure, but now that we know this is a sequel series to Stupid Mario, it seems like the only reason Darkness is put in there is because he's your favorite villain, and his insanity is an inspiration of the Joker. All we can say is, there needs to be an explanation of how he can be back. And to be honest, it's hard to think of a reason without turning this into a copout. It's without a doubt you will explain it in Season 2, but it's still going to bother a lot of people, knowing that you made this decision. Again, it's a bold one, so it's neither good or bad in my opinion. You don't need to give us a post or a video explanation, just be sure to figure out the best way he could possibly be back, and apply it for Season 2. Heck, for the fact, you decided to put Darkness in, it's no doubt you probably already thought this through, before going forward with it.

As a whole, I really did like this episode! And yes the return of beam swords is nice to see. They first appeared in the Stupid Mario Season 1 finale, so it makes nostalgia sense they would appear at this point. And where Stupid Mario Brothers played it off as comedy at first (being an homage to lightsabers,) The Plumber Knight clarifies these are beam swords that were used in the Smash Bros. games. And yeah, to InsanityProd, JR is right. It was only the Nether Saber that connects to Merlin's spirit. Now how the heck can only people with powers turn on a sword that is clearly technology, I have no idea. Keep in mind beam swords are just technology, not made because it connects to someone's spirit. That was one of the only reasons the Nether Saber was so strong. It's something that can be used to kill certain beings who are as powerful as Nox Decious and Darkness, and of course even Merlin. But yeah, it's pretty neat to see the beam swords back again.

All I can say is, I hope you guys have something special in store for us for Season 2. Heck if you can make it darker than this one already was, that would play a great homage to The Dark Knight (one of my favorite movies of all time.) Although I sense that risk that a certain love one might die. That doesn't have to happen, but I hope Season 2 exceeds upon Season 1. I bet not many people have created a Mario story that takes place years later in his future, and so far, this is very great. Take your time writing Season 2, and thanks to everyone who dedicated their work into the production of making this show work. All of your effort definitely shows!

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 Post subject: Re: The Plumber Knight Returns - Episode 10
PostPosted: Mon Jun 30, 2014 11:53 am 
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It took me a bit to organize my thoughts on this season finale but now that I’ve got them all together it’s high time I wrote up my thoughts.

I want to first say that quality wise this is one of the best videos you guys have made. The stock footage transitioned a little roughly in the beginning of the series but by now it’s very fluent.

Mario’s fight with Jeckle was well done. I didn’t get a chance to say so in the past few episodes but Jeckle is easily my favorite character. Although I did notice some inconsistencies with his dialogue in this episode. He usually uses 3rd person speak but there were a few me’s and my’s.

Bill’s reveal to be Wario’s son was a good set up for the next season. The rescuing of Denise was a cute little scene. The Koopa’s little speech to Mario was pretty good, it showed just how inside Mario’s head he was. But onto the action.

Alone, this light -beam sword- saber fight was easily your best one ever. The choreography was fresh, there were new excellent camera angles, and I did miss seeing fights like this. After the battle, Koopa takes off his mask to reveal he’s The Darkness alive again, again, again, again! If anyone wants a simple explanation to hold them over: The Darkness is Mario’s Shadow. While Mario lives, he cannot truly die.

I thought the episode was great say 8/10 and this first season was alright in retrospect. I have a very important critique on the season/series that I must voice now and I hope Richie takes it to heart.

A lot of time has passed since I first discovered your videos but I must say that while all the visuals are miles beyond what they used to be, the writing and dialogue is still par is not sub-par. I am admittedly genre savvy; however, when I can predict what a character is going to say because the script is so color-by-number, that’s a problem. I really think the script could have used another draft or two and here are a few points to back up my case.

Beam Swords. Your brief explanation of the weapon before the fight was great because it did what StMB spent seasons explaining. This time, they weren’t as big of an AssPull (TV Tropes) as they were in Season 1 of StMB, but I think the reveal would have been all the sweeter had it been foreshadowed. I know the reveal was valuable to you but Mario’s beam sword hilt would have been an excellent Chekhov’s Gun. Imagine a scene where Denise saw Mario’s gadgets/ weapons and it was among them. Or if you had a bit like in Iron Man 2 with the Cap’s shield gag. Inserting Chekhov’s Guns adds depth to your series and makes it more rewatchable.

Unfortunately, adding beam swords adds more questions to the mess. How do beam swords still work? Why didn’t Mario use his against Jeckle earlier? Another draft and a few extra lines may have answered these before they were asked. But now comes the inevitable retconning where you address plot holes in the future in a clumsy attempt to patch them up. This pastshadowing happened A LOT in StMB and I don’t want to see PKR suffer because of it. In the past, Richie’s written explanations to cover his tracks such as “Questions and Riddles are the same thing” and “Mario was weaker which is why he bled the most”. C’mon, Richie, just admit your shortcomings; don’t cover them up. IF YOU HAVE TO RETCON THEN SOMETHING WAS POORLY WRITTEN THE FIRST TIME. See X-Men Days of Future Past which retcons missteps and mistakes taken in the series. Find mistakes before they’re made. Mystery and Exposition are one thing but there are scriptural accidents that can be avoided with another look.

Stakes. I don’t even know where to begin with this one. I know from Wiki Richie that Richie doesn’t like it when they kill of super villains in comic book movies. I agree, that’s what the comics are all about. The villains are recurring threats that are thwarted only for them to come back later with a new plan. In PKR, every villain, Dr. Horus, Carson, and Jeckle, as well as Mario’s allies Clause and Gibbs are killed the latter after a death fake out. I understand some of these are due to unavailability of cast members and because you’re unsure if they can film for another season or not. But now when Jeckle comes back because you loved the character and that actor is available then what? Holes and more retconning. Have an Arkham Asylum equivalent where you can store key baddies until you want to use them again. Replacing them with new characters doesn’t work as well as if we spent twice the time with the first character.

The Darkness just threw a monkey wrench into the works here too. I appreciate that you had Luigi be a red herring as to the Koopa’s identity because most fans guessed that; however, having Koopa be The Darkness is somehow less of a surprise. You voiced him, he’s the Jokerest character you’ve made, and this is the FOURTH time you’ve done this twist! I feel really bad for people new to your video universe because my reaction would be “Who’s this Shadow Mario? Oh everyone in the comments is calling him the Darkness and he’s from StMB. Guess I better watch those 75 episodes and a Movie.” Then they witness The Darkness being reborn 3 times and still they won’t have learned any more about this twist ending. I really wanted this series to stand alone but now it’s inevitable attached to everything that came before it. The only thing that could make this work is if Mario is as mad as I am that The Darkness is back again, again, again, again.

Levity. It’s a good thing and it had a place even in the darkest stories. That’s what makes the movies in Marvel’s cinematic and Nolan’s Batman universes great. Is that even though we have character doing important stuff, there’s still a joke here and there. “It’s also nice when the hero actually gets a kiss from his damsel in distress, for a change.” This right here is probably the best written line in the entire season because it has some lightness to it. Not all comedy has to be a massive video game pun or fart joke. Even if it’s subtle, it’s welcome. A famous author once said that comedy always helps storytelling because if you get your audience to laugh you trick them into thinking they’re having a good time. They might not remember any of the details but they remembered that they enjoyed it.

Details. This is my last, smallest point and a really REALLY minor nitpick but the location name “Ferral Town Forest” really bugs me. It’s Ferral City, not a town. And instead of “Town Forest” you could have called it Valley, Vale, Woods, Reaches, Trails, or just simply Forest sounds better. It’s little details like this one that if they were tidied up a bit, the project could be even cooler. You don’t call a Spaceship the Space Flyer II unless you’re 6; you call it the Axalon.

Alright, that took way too long. This next season can be amazing if you have another draft of the script. Make the story tighter, a little lighter, and show us you went the extra mile to give us something great.

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 Post subject: Re: The Plumber Knight Returns - Episode 10
PostPosted: Mon Jun 30, 2014 2:40 pm 
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AdminAdam wrote:
A lot of time has passed since I first discovered your videos but I must say that while all the visuals are miles beyond what they used to be, the writing and dialogue is still par is not sub-par. I am admittedly genre savvy; however, when I can predict what a character is going to say because the script is so color-by-number, that’s a problem. I really think the script could have used another draft or two and here are a few points to back up my case.

Beam Swords. Your brief explanation of the weapon before the fight was great because it did what StMB spent seasons explaining. This time, they weren’t as big of an AssPull (TV Tropes) as they were in Season 1 of StMB, but I think the reveal would have been all the sweeter had it been foreshadowed. I know the reveal was valuable to you but Mario’s beam sword hilt would have been an excellent Chekhov’s Gun. Imagine a scene where Denise saw Mario’s gadgets/ weapons and it was among them. Or if you had a bit like in Iron Man 2 with the Cap’s shield gag. Inserting Chekhov’s Guns adds depth to your series and makes it more rewatchable.

Unfortunately, adding beam swords adds more questions to the mess. How do beam swords still work? Why didn’t Mario use his against Jeckle earlier? Another draft and a few extra lines may have answered these before they were asked. But now comes the inevitable retconning where you address plot holes in the future in a clumsy attempt to patch them up. This pastshadowing happened A LOT in StMB and I don’t want to see PKR suffer because of it. In the past, Richie’s written explanations to cover his tracks such as “Questions and Riddles are the same thing” and “Mario was weaker which is why he bled the most”. C’mon, Richie, just admit your shortcomings; don’t cover them up. IF YOU HAVE TO RETCON THEN SOMETHING WAS POORLY WRITTEN THE FIRST TIME. See X-Men Days of Future Past which retcons missteps and mistakes taken in the series. Find mistakes before they’re made. Mystery and Exposition are one thing but there are scriptural accidents that can be avoided with another look.

The Darkness just threw a monkey wrench into the works here too. I appreciate that you had Luigi be a red herring as to the Koopa’s identity because most fans guessed that; however, having Koopa be The Darkness is somehow less of a surprise. You voiced him, he’s the Jokerest character you’ve made, and this is the FOURTH time you’ve done this twist! I feel really bad for people new to your video universe because my reaction would be “Who’s this Shadow Mario? Oh everyone in the comments is calling him the Darkness and he’s from StMB. Guess I better watch those 75 episodes and a Movie.” Then they witness The Darkness being reborn 3 times and still they won’t have learned any more about this twist ending. I really wanted this series to stand alone but now it’s inevitable attached to everything that came before it. The only thing that could make this work is if Mario is as mad as I am that The Darkness is back again, again, again, again.

Alright, that took way too long. This next season can be amazing if you have another draft of the script. Make the story tighter, a little lighter, and show us you went the extra mile to give us something great.


I actually had a previous discussion about this after I wrote up my review, and want to add onto what Adam said. Although I probably won't add that much partially because A)There's something, as per usual, I probably forgot, and B)Adam is much, much better at critiquing than I ever will. But hopefully I'll find a way to get my point across.

I still stand by that, compared to previous seasons, this was done much better. The camera work is leagues ahead of both your work and the (admittedly limited) internet/low budget productions I've seen. I think you guys have excelled at improving in that, and it shows.

I'm still grateful that Luigi was not the Koopa. Part of my own acceptance of the Koopa being The Darkness was not because it was a great twist, but more because it wasn't Luigi, which I was very afraid of happening. I also admit part of it is just because this is in universe, I've come to accept that one way or another, the Darkness comes back (I'll get to that in a moment.)

And I still believe, if nothing else, I'm happy that the plot never dropped for a full episode or more. I still believe that was a big mistake in Season 5 of SMB, as the whole Ken and Ryu rivalry backstory thing for the SMB universe was hinted to have another player involve (some girl), they forgive each other, and then run around until a certain point. And a lot of people in that season were basically waiting around for specific plot points to pass before things actually happened.

For PKR, I didn't (or it at least wasn't as noticable as in SMB) see that happen. Which I feel is a huge improvement without question.

But, and I think Adam brings it up best, you still have some kinks to work out. I still believe pulling out a beam sword after fighting Jeckle, storming the base, and following the koopa to the forest without explanation of why he had it/it wasn't used before in show was a mistake. I'd like to add making it too easy after beating Jeckle to get Denise (when you showed there were more guards/more people to fight down the road) without an explanation why is a flaw as well.

I know the Darkness coming back again, and the beam sword still working (which, to be honest, I don't remember it being tied to Merlin in the first place and not working after death as a plot point, but I'll admit I may be forgetting something) is upsetting people. It's not upsetting me that much for a simple reason: These errors have happened far too many times in the SMB universe that at this point getting mad about it is pointless in my opinion.

Back during the SMB Movie Act 2, I'm pretty sure I questioned the Darkness coming back alive through that whole Counter Curse thing (which made finding the truth stone completely pointless for the darkness in so many ways.) I thought the hat thing was dragging it out also. The fourth time I saw him, I gave up. Because the thing is, like the many times in comics/comic film universes, this pattern of Darkness some how always comes back one way or another has essentially been used so much is essentially equivalent to "Joker never dies/always comes back." or whatever comic character who is supposed to die somehow coming back through explanation we just came up with it. It's a pointless thing to argue about in my mind.

So is anything having to do with Beam Swords. Remember when the Nether Saber was supposed to be the strongest beam sword/weapon ever? The first time that was accidentally/purposely ignored, I called it out. But the Nether Saber was forgotten about over time and just became a regular saber. Arguing anything involving Beam Sword purpose is pointless at this point. It's so messed up to a point where trying to fix it will just annoy people as much as the rest of the retconing. It's a weapon that glows people. If another Beam Sword being the strongest plot point comes up (which it shouldn't), it won't have any weight to it. It just is.

Just as Shadow Mario coming back just is at this point. To be honest, I wasn't trying to get myself interested in the mystery of who the Koopa was. I just really, really didn't want it to be Luigi. Not only because it is a cliche (and I don't even mind cliches that much), but because it isn't a smart thing to do for so many reasons. Luigi needs to stay dead.

Shadow Mario is always going to come back. I've accepted this. The time to fix that was long ago. I don't care that he is back. I don't hate it and it is not Luigi is what is making me accept this.

But Rich, things like the beam sword not being used on Jeckle are things you need to question script wise. I suspect the reason you didn't use it was because you wanted the final battle this season with the Koopa to be more exciting than Jeckle. To be more Epic. As was the reason you didn't explain why Shadow Mario is back until Season 2. Cliffhangers get people excited to watch next time around. I get it. And that's why I didn't mind above.

But honestly? You can't have certain thing happen solely on that thought. If Mario had a beam sword on him the whole time, he should have used it on Jeckle (or in this episode, an explanation should have been given for why he didn't use it. One that doesn't feel tacked on.) I personally think, like how Bill is a new character with roots to old characters, Koopa should have been handled the same way. That probably would have angered people less, and would make the whole cliffhanger ending of "What's going to happen now?" much more interesting to everyone else.

I have one last suggestion, and I don't know if anyone will agree with me on this, but I'm going to say this anyway. Rich, make PKR Season 2 it for PKR. Wrap it up on a high note. Review Season 1 for any flaws and plot points. Look at all the threads and anything that doesn't make any sense. And wrap it up. All of it.

And then, after PKR Season 2, make a new show. New universe, new characters, new plot. Nothing involving video game characters. Start fresh.

I think you guys need that. Anyone who demanded SMB continue is gone, based on the view count I'm seeing. I'm sure there are plenty of people happy to see you do another. But I think you have the chance to start something new and original with your production, and have all equipment and talent at a better level than previously. Make an original show. It can be action based, comedy based, mystery based, ect. Your choice. But I think you guys need it. I think you guys have the equipment, and the number of people to make something new and then not have to worry about being stuck in a position where a lot of people question certain plot points. But I think a fresh production is exactly what you guys need after PKR Season 2. I won't demand it. If you keep going with this, so be it. But you guys, from a writing perspective, need to practice avoiding plot trip ups like the Saber thing. As well as perfecting pacing also. A new show, without anything related to video games, but of your own original creation, can work. I think you are in a unique position right now where stopping PKR after Season 2 won't anger the majority of people currently subscribed, and more people will come/stay on board as a result. Not to mention, you are more than prepared production wise and staff wise.

That's my thoughts. I want to also open up a new thread to get more thoughts/critiques from others. Will do that shortly.

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 Post subject: Re: The Plumber Knight Returns - Episode 10
PostPosted: Mon Jun 30, 2014 5:11 pm 
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TheHiddenOne wrote:
AdminAdam wrote:
I have one last suggestion, and I don't know if anyone will agree with me on this, but I'm going to say this anyway. Rich, make PKR Season 2 it for PKR. Wrap it up on a high note. Review Season 1 for any flaws and plot points. Look at all the threads and anything that doesn't make any sense. And wrap it up. All of it.

And then, after PKR Season 2, make a new show. New universe, new characters, new plot. Nothing involving video game characters. Start fresh.

I agree with a lot of your points, THO, but I feel differently about starting fresh. I suppose to restate my feeling on The Darkness, I thought when Richie said only 1 season was made and there might be a season 2 that season 1 would be complete within itself. Now, it's entirely reliant on the next season and if view counts are to be believed, each part of the continuity chain gets less hits. It's like, After Season 1 a portion of the audience remains then another portion of that portion sticks around for season 3 and so on.

A burning question drove the plot of PKR: Who is Koopa? Simmilar questions have been asked in fiction such as Who/what is Rosebud or Who is Amon? Your answer to that question was delivered mid-fight scene and wasn't a very good answer because it created more questions. The burning question should be a mechanism for telling the story not the heart of it so that if and when you answer the question, people still stick around.

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 Post subject: Re: The Plumber Knight Returns - Episode 10
PostPosted: Mon Jun 30, 2014 6:17 pm 
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AdminAdam wrote:
I agree with a lot of your points, THO, but I feel differently about starting fresh. I suppose to restate my feeling on The Darkness, I thought when Richie said only 1 season was made and there might be a season 2 that season 1 would be complete within itself. Now, it's entirely reliant on the next season and if view counts are to be believed, each part of the continuity chain gets less hits. It's like, After Season 1 a portion of the audience remains then another portion of that portion sticks around for season 3 and so on.

A burning question drove the plot of PKR: Who is Koopa? Simmilar questions have been asked in fiction such as Who/what is Rosebud or Who is Amon? Your answer to that question was delivered mid-fight scene and wasn't a very good answer because it created more questions. The burning question should be a mechanism for telling the story not the heart of it so that if and when you answer the question, people still stick around.


I agree with you on the "Season 1 being complete within itself" comment. My intent with that comment was to try to get a focus on making a season story that has a clearly defined beginning and ending. Basically to avoid ending on "Let's end on this because fans would think it is cool"/"end on this for shock value, we'll answer the question later". Which, intended or not, was what happened.

My reason for bringing up a fresh story was because I felt it would be much easier to practice/improve not hitting plot holes like the SMB universe currently has (which need to constantly be explained the following season), and have something that could easily be made into a season plot with a clear beginning and ending, while also finding areas that could be expanded into future stories in future seasons without having to resort to bringing stuff back that requires an explanation that still brings up more questions and/or becomes predictable/annoys people. And they may be able to use that to build up an audience again.

I have no intent to say "This has to end. End it" or that they can't do more. I still think PKR Season 1 is their best work so far, and I fully support more seasons if they truly believe they can pull it off.

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 Post subject: Re: The Plumber Knight Returns - Episode 10
PostPosted: Wed Jul 02, 2014 3:51 am 
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So, first off i just wanted to say that this is my first post since joining the forums, so hi. Anyway, i totally loved the series, especially episode ten because it tied the whole thing together very nicely and Richie and the gang did a really good job! I was very happy to see that the Koopa turned out not to be Luigi, because that was what everyone was expecting, so i'm glad that it was the Darkness instead. I just hope that Richie is going to explain what happened with the Darkness after SMB well enough so we don't have any plotholes, and i am especially interested to see what that's going to turn out like since he died at the end of 75 and everything. When he took his mask off I was so excited because the Darkness was one of my favorite characters in SMB, and i was always hoping he would return in some way. :D
All in all, thank you RMA Prod for making this amazing series to bring some life back into YouTube, and especially thanks for everything else, you guys rock and i hope this continues very soon!

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